...and then

Wednesday, 28 December 2011

About effing PMS

There's a hungry, mean lion in the small of my back
Mane in my right hip as its tail whips my left.
Sometimes it reaches through my pelvis
Into my womb,
Slivering it in half; no anaesthesia.

Two green beastly carnivores
Rest in my knees. They eat cartilage and chew on my bone
They stretch those thigh-long limbs in square-centimetre space
Consuming, delivering, leaving pain Post-its.

A crazy red bee buzzes in my frontal lobe
And my temper races with my flash of impulse
I see red, I see green, I see everything in between.
Acid leaps, fires wind their way through
Yet the crazy red bee buzzes, buzzes.

Breasts mauled by a shape-shifting ogre
Who rests on my heart on such days
Bra-less seems like a good idea. Sagging be damned.
There's relief in a Brufen, there's relief in heat
But it will be blood that will kill these beasts


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She drifted away with his cigarette smoke before he could catch her
Imprison her
In a green glass jar.

How long will you be gone, he asked,
Not looking up from violent but quiet scribbling in his book.
His pencil plundered a stick figure, a dead flower.

Till the silver on my anklet fades
Till black doesn't hurt anymore
Till when the ship sails off my shoulder

Then I'll be back for more, she said.

A knife glinted, his hand  a ready, righteous Brutus
Her skin a sheen of love, glowing, nonchalant
Till he knifed a lost ship and tainted the brown of her shoulder

"No sailing away for this one. Ever," he said
Grabbing her snake-hair and pouring her
As she sighed in relief, into the green glass jar.


Saturday, 3 December 2011

It's like having lost an entire arm

So in unprecedented stupidity and colossal absentmindedness, tonight, after a fantastic party at a friend's place, I drove off leaving my beloved phone on the roof of my car.

Here's what happened. All week, I'd been looking forward to this party for one reason only. I had officially taken up the responsibility of taking pictures for this do. A friend moved into a lovely home and had enough space to throw what is best known as a fab party -- she had a Masterchef theme. From shopping for ingredients to plating it up (as we all so casually say, in these days of the post-MC era) she had the whole thing planned out beautifully.

As soon as I walked in, I was delighted to see the Christmas tree because, come on, who in their right minds does not like to photograph those, right? So I started clicking away. No no, back up a bit. Earlier that day, my camera started doing something really funny. It refused to release the shutter on clicking. I thought if I kept it switched off for a bit, it would fix itself. It didn't. I went to some shady joint (because those are the only ones open on Fridays) to see if they could fix it. They couldn't. I took it back with me, decided to check if I could transfer all my pictures from the SD card to my laptop, in case I had forgotten about a few. On inserting it into the reader, it gave me a virus indication. Steadily running out of time, I ditched the card, bought a new one popped it into the camera and went very late for her party.

I took the chance that someone else there would have a DSLR and I could just change chips and use theirs as they'd all be busy cooking their respective courses. I got lucky they did. I finally sighed in relief -- at least something was going right now. And boy, did I have a glorious time or what. I might sound a bit conceited but I got some very nice pictures that captured the mood of the entire evening. I got the light right, I got the angles right, I got the moment right. Best of all, lots of good looking people -- just what a camera loves. So I spend about five hours clicking, clicking, clicking. People, chopping, whisking, sorting things out, hanging out, the Christmas tree, the ornaments, candles, the gorgeous outdoor seating. I didn't miss a thing. I intended to create a collage for this friend and give it to her framed.

I left early because I had my daughter with me, even though I knew this would be way past her bed time, I had to because of baby sitting issues. And I didn't want to get out of this because taking pictures of such a party was a challenge to me. And I really wanted to know I was up to it. So I left early, strapped my daughter into her seat and drove off.  About three kilometers into the drive I neared a roundabout and braked, heard something tumbling off the back of my car, thought it was pebbles being tossed off my car. I reached home, dug for my SD card, so I could put it in right away and work on the edited pictures.

No SD card in my pockets. None in the car, none in the baby seat, none anywhere. Next stop. Look for phone. Same routine, not to be found. My mind did a quick rewind and I saw my phone on the top of my car when I was belting my daughter in. Tucked away under the phone, was apparently. my SD card. Suffice it to say, I did not find the SD card, and more that 200 pictures, decent ones,  are gone.

I dropped the daughter home and drove all the way back to my friend's house hoping, agaimst hope, that it wouldn't have gottten run over.  Well, anyway, to cut a long story short --- it did get run over,  My phone looks like electronic roadkill. And being one of those people who always "needs to back up soon", I haven't already done it. So pictures, videos of the kids, stuff I've downloaded, numbers -- all gone. Digitally bankrupt is the term I believe.

Lessons? Do not look forward for weeks for something, shit happens. Always leave the roof of your car alone. Finally, when  you see signs right from the beginning that things are going to go wrong, listen to the damn signs.